Multiple sclerosis, Struggles, What was I thinking?

Is it just me?

I can't decide whether I'm a victim of my own technophilia or the scrubbing-bubbles effect MS can have on the brain. Lately, it's logins. I have nearly four dozen of them, all told. Two I know by heart. The rest are a confusing heap of random qwertiness that leaves me grasping at straws for the… Continue reading Is it just me?

Nick, Struggles

I’m positive the glass is half empty

Nick and I have a long-running debate in our house. It's part of the oil-and-water, fire-and-ice dynamic we've functioned on for years. His sunny-side-up brand of optimism strikes me as Pollyanna-ish and naive. My glass-half-empty, pessimistic realistic approach to life grates on him. But I might be close to winning this argument. Hear me out.… Continue reading I’m positive the glass is half empty

Multiple sclerosis, Struggles

Not disabled enough

I've never much noticed whether any quizzical, judgmental glances are thrown in my general direction when I break out my placard and park in a handicapped spot. To the casual observer, I look to be in good shape besides needing to shed like 50 (OK, 75) pounds. Most days, I display no obvious symptoms. I… Continue reading Not disabled enough

Multiple sclerosis, Struggles

The hell month

I'm a month into this, my longest exacerbation since being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in September 2010. I've had flare-ups, but they've all been quickly extinguished by either starting a round of steroids or because the disease-modifying therapy was working. I don't know if I explain just how life-rending these tend to be without sounding… Continue reading The hell month

Multiple sclerosis, Struggles

Oh, so this is what it feels like

I'm in the throes of a particularly nasty exacerbation, one compounded by the fact that I don't start my steroid infusion until Monday. So these past few days have been among the worst I've had with MS since being diagnosed. What started as a tiny weakening in my left leg has turned into a unilateral… Continue reading Oh, so this is what it feels like

Multiple sclerosis, Nick, Struggles, What was I thinking?

The year that was

2011 is a year I'd rather leave in the rear-view mirror. I think the world agrees with me. We should have known things were off to an inauspicious start when blackbirds fell dead from the sky on New Year's Eve (of course, that just happened this year, too). The bad had a way of eclipsing the… Continue reading The year that was

Multiple sclerosis, Nick, Struggles

The need equation

I think one of the reasons Nick and I get along so famously is that we both lean on each other about the same. It certainly can't hurt. He brings me coffee and cleans the litterboxes and there should really be another sweet gesture in between those two. And I ... well, I make things… Continue reading The need equation

Multiple sclerosis, Struggles

Excuses, excuses

I haven't been posting regularly, which could be read as bad and good. Good, because it means I have nothing to complain about, which supposes that the worst of MS has retreated for now (the remitting part of relapsing/remitting). Bad, because of course there are topics to talk about — it's been a busy month.… Continue reading Excuses, excuses

Multiple sclerosis, Struggles, What was I thinking?

Lofty goals

So a woman with multiple sclerosis has trekked Mount Everest? And here I whine about the elevators being out at my office for the second day in a row. Three floors, nearly thirty thousand feet. Really, what's the difference?