I was never a big fan of naps. In kindergarten, I would dilly-dally until I had to be physically put in my cot. Even then, I never went to sleep, instead daydreaming under my blanket or finding scissors and giving myself a haircut. (What can I say? I was a bit of a wild child.)… Continue reading Turn out the lights, please
Author: Jenn Godwin
When your mourning has a sound
This song gets to me. In a big way. "Heirloom" by Sufjan Stevens. Lyrics: When your heirloom’s wilted brown When the devil’s pushing down When your mourning has a sound And you hesitate to laugh How quickly will your joy pass How quickly will your joy pass And when you walk inside I feel the… Continue reading When your mourning has a sound
Competing diagnoses
The week I wound up in the hospital began on a Sunday when we went to a friend's house for an afternoon gathering and I was so weak I sat the whole time, which isn't like me. I thought I might be coming down with something. And that's when we came up with Diagnosis #1:… Continue reading Competing diagnoses
From push to pace
I'm what you'd call a bit of a workaholic. I regularly put in 50-hour-and-above weeks before winding up an MS patient, working odd shifts and split schedules. I'm such a nerd in that my idea of leisure time involved learning how to get better at my job by taking on projects in coding, video editing… Continue reading From push to pace
Moving past the negative
I never want to say "I used to dance." But the reality, though, is that limitations come with the territory. I can't move the way I used to, the way I'm used to. Every step is different. Every muscle feels heavy. Every movement takes a conscious effort, and even then it's sometimes not what I… Continue reading Moving past the negative
Life in the poky lane
The universe was apparently trying to tell me something when I got MS. The message? Sloooooowwww dowwwwwwn. And I've tried to heed the advice, really. But slow isn't really my style. I'm more a it's-already-finished-and-filed-away-move-onto-the-next-challenge personality type — I feel in my element frenetically zig-zagging from one task to the next. I don't linger. I… Continue reading Life in the poky lane
The physics of disability
My life of late has come down to a simple equation explained rather matter of factly by physics. That doesn't make the reality any easier to endure. Tripod (and apparently overweight) dog + stairs to get outside + my general weakness and numbness in arms = Huge fail. Ella, our mutt mix, being the elite… Continue reading The physics of disability
Head case
Went into the narrow tube of magnetic fields (great band) today for another look-see of my innards. I feel like the Alan Shepard of MRIs by now, I've logged so much time. It's gotten somewhat easier, although I always have that last-second panicked breathing before I'm guided into the machine. I've found if I close… Continue reading Head case
Walking contradiction
Anyone who knows me knows that I have a thing for shoes. Love. them. So of course it devastated me to think that I couldn't teeter totter along in silly heels anymore. But so long as my legs aren't all gumby-fied, I'm going to rock the hell out of some sky-high shoes. With my cane… Continue reading Walking contradiction
Bee stings and snake bites and hyperbaric chambers (oh my!)
As I am guessing is the case with most diseases, there are a couple of approaches doctors must take - treating the disease and treating the symptoms. Right now we are in the throes of handling my myriad symptoms, which I elaborated on here. I did the oral steroids thing and tried to tough it… Continue reading Bee stings and snake bites and hyperbaric chambers (oh my!)
One, Wild & Precious 