Multiple sclerosis, Nick, Struggles, What was I thinking?

Comedy is tragedy plus time

Funny, they never tell how how long this little formula for humor takes. How much distance you need before the sharp edges of a prickly reality dull somewhat.

When it becomes palatable, these painful treatments, the uncertain future, the broken body.

Multiple sclerosis is really no laughing matter.

But I can have a chuckle at my own expense. Starting with Day 1.

Still, back in the beginning, Nick and I had an ongoing philosophical disagreement over how to process my diagnosis. He was all positive, positive, positive to the point of naiveness. My approach was a bit more, uh, raw. Not exactly negative, but more realistic, I reasoned.

Why yes, this is a bang-up parking job. And I left it that way, too. Deal.

A grieving period, I said. What exactly I was grieving, I’m not sure now. My supposed lost future? No one’s good health is guaranteed. Preemptive pining is about as abstract as you can get.

So I adjusted my attitude. No, not to blithely positive (x3). But a little less tragic.

MS has offered me this: The ability to understand firsthand what extraordinary, fragile creatures we are, and the miracles and limitations of the human body.

I’ve also gained perspective and learned that, like my dog, I should live more in the moment. I try not to take myself too seriously, even though this disease is dead serious.

I make gimp jokes sometimes, mainly about myself. It’s been a coping mechanism, sure.

I compare my walk to Keyser Soze’s. I park in handicapped places, badly. And don’t care.

I talk about bull penis canes and how much Nick can be a pain in my ass.

I get embarrassed playing dueling carts with my mom.

Attempt cartwheels with mixed success.

Wish that panties were easier to put on. (Or pants, for that matter).

So maybe there’s a new formula?

Comedy is tragedy with perspective.

Comitragic (Hope + Loss) = Me with MS.

3 thoughts on “Comedy is tragedy plus time”

  1. humor… dark, dry, sarcastic, twisted….

    it’s the only thing that has kept me going. i continually make fun of myself because i have to. i don’t think i’ve grieved yet… at least i haven’t gone through the stages of grief they talk about… i haven’t gotten mad yet… i get frustrated, i’ve been sad, i’ve been brave… i’ve been pitiful… and i expect i will be all of these things over and over again….my biggest problem is fear….

    1. I’m glad we can find something to laugh about. It’s really been the best medicine. Well, maybe not the best, but it’s up there.

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