Me and MS have a little game we like to play. I call it Catch Me If You Can, Sucka!
The idea is simple: I go about my life as if nothing has changed. Mind over matter, I’m not my disease, and all.
I go shopping. I run errands. I go to work. I work some more. I shop some more. Do a date night with my husband. I clean house. I’m feeling good. I’m strutting like John Travolta at the beginning of Saturday Night Fever (although with a better soundtrack in my head.) I even have the audacity to start a project.
And just when I thought I was in a groove – WHAM!
MS gives me a not-so gentle reminder.
“You can’t do that,” it taunts like a schoolyard bully who just found my secret hiding spot.
Sad thing is, it’s right. I did all of those things this past week and am paying big-time for it now. Just try and peel me off of the couch — I think we have merged into one organism now that I’ve been sprawled out on it for so long.
I’ve known since Day 1 that I would have to make some changes. I’ve mostly resisted, much to my own detriment.
Why is it so hard to admit weakness?
Because the crash comes regardless, so I might as well prepare.
In another vein, I’m tired of bitching and moaning. Or at least I’m tired of giving the impression that all I do with my life is bitch and moan. So just to prove to myself that I am more than just this MS thing, I plan on posting updates on various projects. Right now Nick and I are in serious purge mode, but we are slowing beginning to see floor in our “storage” rooms. (Hey, it’s tough living in a 1952 house with 2011 stuff!) But we (OK, I) have big plans that involve painting and furniture rearranging and all sorts of glorious tasks that I will start and Nick will finish.
Thankfully, I’m over my toile phase. But now I like this:
An now comes the part where I convince Nick that he likes it, too.